.

Really trying not to be disillusioned or discouraged, but that's incredibly difficult at the moment. I just feel like no matter what I do, nothing ever seems to go right or according to my plans. That's life I suppose, but it's not like things ever go slightly off course and then somehow end up fine. Things go totally off course and then I'm back to fucking square one.

I don't know why I'm investing effort into a blog entry about this, I should be perfectly accustomed to this seemingly inescapable aspect of my life.