I know I said I was over it, I'm trying to not get upset over it- BUT I'm only human.
WHY did I go look at Brandon's Myspace? I already saw the pictures of him and Lucas, especially the one where Brandon kisses him on the cheek (FUNNY THING IS, BRANDON AND I TOOK AN EXACT SAME PICTURE WHEN WE WENT TO THE ZOO LAST YEAR. Fuck that), but actually SEEING on his Myspace "In a Relationship" really just put the knife in my heart today.
I fucking hate this. It's not that I have feelings for Brandon anymore- I'm positive I don't- but it's just the feeling that I've been replaced, that he's found something better than me. Which is perfectly natural, and eventually I'll be doing the same thing, but for the time being it pretty much makes me want to die and makes me feel like an inadequate piece of shit.
Maybe I should temporarily delete him as my friend, just until I know for sure that I won't be affected by looking at his page. Then when I am for sure completely positively over it, we'll see about being friends again. I think for now though, I just can't have the accessability to look at his new life.
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1 comment:
if you dont think you can resist the temptation to look at his profile them maybe deleting will help?
I know its sucks...trust me.
But don't take it personal. Because you are an awesome and thoughtful boyfriend...something he never appreciated.
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